Through Colour Blind Eyes: Chapter 7 - Gen 1

~ A Thousand Years ~

"Cos you should just tell her, you are being an idiot!!!" If Jazz says that to me one more time I'm going to brain him, I wish I had never told him now, I usually keep my secrets to myself, for this very reason, people latch onto your secrets and make a meal of them.

"Get lost Jazz - there is no point, she's not exactly purple is she - I'll get over it, I've got no choice!! I stick to the colour code even if you don't, now change the subject before I punch you"

"You get over it!!! You have been moping for weeks, you are driving me nuts, you need to do something about it or get a life." The door opened and she walks in, oh man why did I ever agree to come with him!!! She was smiling when she came through the door, but when she saw us sitting here her face changed, I wander what that means, she sat at the computer and turned it on without even speaking. Jazz explained why we were here, I'm glad he did I'm not sure I could actually speak to her.

"Tell her" he whispered really quietly, I hope to berry she didn't hear him. I thumped his leg as a warning but not hard enough to make him squeal the last thing I want is for him to attract her attention, I don't trust him to keep his mouth shut. I would fade if she asked what we were fighting about and he told her. He punched my arm pretty hard - the Berry Hole!!

"Yeah like I'm gonna do it in front of you anyway!!" I couldn't help but punch him again a little harder this time, keeping my eye on her to make sure she isn't watching us.

"You wuss!!" He cracked me again, but it backfired on him his knuckles hit my elbow and it hurt him more than it hurt me. I smirked at him.

"Anyway she is actually supposed to be purple, her parents and two brothers are!!" Yeah like I'm going to fall for that one, nice try Jazz. If only she was purple I would have faded and gone to heaven by now.

"Shut the Fudge up you idiot, I don't believe you!!!" I looked over at Lilly, she's checking her emails, and isn't acting like she can hear us, but then she takes a quick look in our direction and asked "So what are we doing later?"

"Just the usual, I think ....... say Lil, what colour are you supposed to be? What colour are your parents?" I felt the colour drain from my face, the Berry Hole is going to do it, I need to get out of here!!!

She answered him without even looking up. "Purple, I thought you already knew that, and if your next question is why am I like this, ask Mango he knows the medical ins and outs of it and what it's called - I keep forgetting."

"See!!!" Jazz gloated then thumped me again, she took another quick look at us, just in time for her to see me slap him straight back. Damn!!! She laughed then went back to her emails. My mind started swimming, she is supposed to be purple, I couldn't help but think that was Berry's way of punishing me for what I have done, I knew one day my sins would catch up with me!! My brain started racing around the fact that she should be purple.

"I need to shoot." I said standing up, I had to get out of there before I crack up.

"Stay Cosmic, you always do this, you are a pain in the butt, you need to stop moping." he tried to grab my arm but I shook him off.

"Its got nothing to do with moping - I seriously have something I need to do, Ill catch you later." I wasn't going to stop and argue with him - I couldn't get out of there quick enough. Closing the door behind me I leaned against it so that I could catch my breath, I felt like I had been holding my breath the whole time I had been sat in that room with Lilly. What the fudge is wrong with me???!!!

I spotted Mango in the library, as I was walking past the window, I'd found him a lot quicker than I thought I would.. "Mango why is Lilly colourless?"

He looked at me suspiciously for a minute "She has a medical condition, Albinism, basically she has no colour pigment in her skin hair or eyes, why?"

"Just wandered, thanks Mango." I went to leave but he grabbed my arm to stop me.

"Why are you asking about Lilly?" Oh heck, what can I say, I should have prepared myself for him asking me that question.

"I am just curious, I got to wandering why she had no colour when her parents are purple, its strange because there was a boy at my last school like Lilly his parents were also purple, I wandered if it is some weakness in my colour." after a few minutes he relaxed and smiled. He seems to have brought my bullshit. Fudge ... now he has had me talking I've forgotten the name of it "Can you write the name of it down please, so I can do some research?"

He offered to tell me about it but I made the lame excuse of not wanting to hold him up and I didn't mind researching about it, it would give me something useful to do. While he wrote down the name of the medical condition I did think of one question that he could answer for me, if he knew the answer, the main question that has been bouncing off the walls of my skull 24/7. "You know I always wandered what would happen to that boy, never seeing colourless berries before I thought he was a one off and with the colour code thought he would never be able to have a wife or kids."

"It's actually not as uncommon as you think, not sure about it just being purple though. I know a boy in my town who is like it too, his parents are blue. There has actually been an amendment in the colour code that allows colourless berries to marry coloured berries but only the colour that they should be, the colour of their parents. None of this matters in the town were I come from as we are allowed to mix, my mom is actually a mixed berry." he smiled at me again, am I smiling because I feel like grinning right now. I didn't want to give myself away, especially not to him. Legally we can be together - he doesn't have a clue what he's just done for me!!!!

I trusted what Mango had told me but I needed to double check for myself. I have to make sure I am not about to break any laws, I really couldn't afford to get into any trouble, my finger prints are what are going to hang me eventually - the day I get dragged into a police station for anything is the day my life is over.

I found a few things that surprised me, mainly that if Lilly has children they would more likely turn out to be purple, there was a very low chance of them being colourless like she is. This is getting better and better every minute, the best thing being we legally could be together and there is nothing anyone can do about it. Oh Berry - what about if she doesn't like me, then what am I going to do???!!!

I stood outside the door nervously and took a very deep breath, do I knock or just walk in? We don't usually knock, I guess she would find that pretty strange. I am going to tell Lilly how I feel, that's if I can actually speak when I'm stood in front of her, that's why I brought flower in case I get tongue tied.

I opened the door and slipped into the room quietly. Fudge!!! Everyone is still here. I froze in panic, there is no way I can do this in front of everyone and there is no way I am getting out of this room without anyone seeing the flowers hidden behind my back. Only Sunny had acknowledge me entering the room, if I could just dump these flowers. I backed up to the computer desk, and quickly put the flowers down behind me and then looked around to see if anyone had seen me do it, Sunny is still watching me.

Sunny looked at me and frowned, it probably doesn't help that I'm stood here scowling at him. I really don't like the way he is dancing with Lily. His eyes look in the direction of the flowers and he started to smirk, he had seen me, I didn't think I would get away with it somehow. Sunny already knows how I feel about Lilly and like Jazz he has been nagging me for ages to do something about it - he's another one who doesn't care about the colour code.

I wanted to punch his lights out!!! He is winding me up on purpose doing his ... 'dirty dancing' routine ... I've seen what it can lead to with him. Every minute he is getting closer to her, if he touches her I'll fade him, the worst thing is he knows it is getting to me, the smirk on his face tells me that, he is doing it on purpose. I started dancing to take the mick, then ran my finger across my throat telling him to cut his game and pointed towards the door with my thumb.

He understood me perfectly, making his excuses after a few minutes, using his history assignment as the reason for him leaving. He cut his eyes at me as he pushed past me just to let me know he was not happy. I stayed for quite a while after playing my guitar, I thought I would give him and me time to calm down a little, if I had followed him we would probably have ended up fighting.

As soon as I walked into our room Sunny challenged me - he beat me to it, because that is exactly what I had planned for him. "What the fudge was that all about? you doughnut - I was enjoying myself till you told me to pull the plug."

"I didn't like the way you were doing your 'dirty dancing' routine with Lilly - I know what you're like remember - keep your sweaty paws off her, besides she ain't yellow and I know you're not fussy about colour, but I am!!"

"Ouch!!! well unless my eyes deceive me Lilly ain't exactly purple either - so come on what's your game, I saw the flowers, are you FINALLY going to admit your feelings for Lilly and are sacking your colour code principals??

"She should be purple, her parents are purple, I've checked the colour code and its perfectly legal for me and Lilly to be together, unlike what you, Jazz and Alpine are doing with that little red devil you're all sharing!!"

"Oh talk of the devil!! It looks like its your turn tonight Sunny." Ruby had just walked into the room. I looked at Ruby, she disgusted me, I don't know how Sunny can touch her knowing Jazz and Alpine are doing exactly the same thing with her!!! "How could you when you know where she's been?? One of these days you are going to catch something!!!"

"Who's rattled his cage." She spoke to Sunny and ignored me, hardly giving him chance to speak before she started mauling him.

"Ignore him - he's finally going to admit he has a thing for Lilly, hes a little love sick, has been for months!!" He is really pushing his luck with me!!!! "Wait till the nerd finds out - there is going to be fireworks!!" They started giggling, then it went quiet, sucking face, this is the point where I usually walk out, but not tonight, sod them!!!!

"You two can go and find somewhere else to conduct your sordid affair tonight, I'm going to bed." I am sick of getting kicked out of my own room just so as they can have their fun.

"Oh come on man - an hour tops" Sunny started whining.

"No!!! Forget it - find another room!!!" There is no way that I am going to sleep I'm too wound up, I just felt like being spiteful for a change, he shouldn't have wound me up.

Then I realized, unless Sunny tells her, she won't have a clue where the flowers came from. This is where I struggle, I've not even spoken to her yet, I can't, I freeze up and can't breath any time I'm near her. If she had been alone tonight I would probably only just have stood there like a dumb idiot anyway!!! How am I ever going to .........email? That's lame? I'm lame I can't even talk to her for Berry's sake!!! Email is the best I can do for now, at least she will know. So I started typing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

TWO WEEKS LATER

Two weeks and three days of total silence have had me crawling the walls. In my head - "she's ignoring me because she doesn't like me." goes round and round until that's all I can think. My inbox is permanently open waiting for the ping of an incoming email, but whenever one does come, it's never what I want. Maybe she thinks I'm a jerk for emailing her.

Before the holiday I left two bunches of flowers in her room and sent her two emails - nothing. It only takes a few minutes to send an email saying "I don't like you" but she hasn't. I have tried to convince myself she is waiting till after she returns from the holidays. That's today.

Staying at school during the holiday really didn't help, Dad's leave cancelled at the last minute, I had no other choice, remind me never to get a military career, he is never here for me especially since Mom died. Ive spent two weeks hauled up in this room bouncing off the walls, just to avoid Lime - Lime, I don't even won't to think about her right now - Poison Ivy that's what her parents should have called her. My feelings for Lilly are over ruling anything else going on in my life right now, everything else is being pushed to the back of my mind where it can be overlooked and forgotten.

I'm watching the cars driving past through the bedroom window, sometimes this room does have it's advantages being at the front of the house, I can see who is coming and going. I'm driving myself crazy, I have gotten so obsessed with her, I need her for two reasons, firstly because I think I might just have fallen in love with her, secondly - Fudge!!!!! I don't want to even think about it. I notice a taxi pull up and stop. The back door flies open and Mango falls out of the cab with a couple of heavy looking bags. She's back. The minute I see her my second reason for needing her flies straight out of the window, I'll just have to deal with that later.

I've already put more flowers in her room and sent another email, I did both this morning. Surely one of the first thing she will do is check her emails after being away for two weeks. I watched her get out of the cab, my stomach flipped over, she's laughing at Mango buried under the bags and helps him up. They are both laughing hysterically then she started skipping round him like she is teasing him. She looks so happy.

I hate watching them together - then it hit me. The Son ... of ... a Fudge!!!! He has gone and stole her from right under my nose and I never saw it coming ..... because I never saw him as a threat!! Yeah ... I know Sunny,Jazz, and even Lime have told me he is sweet on her but really ........... he is a nerd ......... and shes ......... she wouldn't would she?? Oh Berry!!!!

I went a little crazy thinking about Lilly and Mango together, I couldn't sleep planning to get her attention and probably went a little O.T.T. Creeping into their room in the middle of the night with 6 bunches of flowers. Surely that would get her attention. Some part of me wanted her to wake up and catch me, she would have no choice but to acknowledge me then.

I don't know what made me look out of the window, but I wished now that I hadn't.

I saw them together on the park. like they hadn't already spend enough time together over the holidays. This is driving me crazy.

Since Sunny got back off his holidays I have tried to pull myself together, but he can see I'm not right, I told him I'd been bored for the past few weeks alone and craved some company. So when he said everyone was meeting up in the common room and I should come, I couldn't really refuse, I'd backed myself into a corner.

We played domino's while we waited for everyone to turn up. Mango and Lilly walked in and sat down to join the game, Sunny smirked at me then started "What were you two doing in the park making out - Mango is NEVER late for anything!!!" Sunny started laughing and winked at Mango, Sunny is laughing at me - Berry Hole!!! - he knows how I feel.!!

"No!!! The sap was trying to get me a teddy bear out of the grabbing machine, he would still be there now if I hadn't dragged him away!!" Lilly answered. How can she just sit there blatantly not acknowledging the flower, emails or me??!!

"A Teddy bear - awww how romantic, it must be love!!!" Sunny was laughing his head off, Mango just sat there scowling while his cheeks turned red, he's embarrassed "Shut up Sunshine!!" Mango snapped.

My clenched fist smashed down on the table sending the domino's flying everywhere, I didn't even realize I was doing it until my hand hit the table - I couldn't listen to this for another minute, I think I'm going to puke. I stood up and could feel all three sets of eyes looking at me. I stormed out.

After losing my evening meal down the toilet, I pulled myself together and went back, I couldn't help it, she couldn't avoid me forever especially if I am there in front of her, besides I wanted to watch the pair of them together to see if there was anything romantic going on between them. I start playing my guitar then I noticed Lilly stood there watching me, she is smiling.

One minute she gives me a little hope ...........

The next she takes it all away again .........

Caramel appears and they stand there looking at me while they are talking, they are talking about me I just know they are. I'm getting paranoid now, they start whispering and giggling, all the time they keep looking back to me. I can just imagine they are having a right laugh about the flowers and me. Why doesn't she just tell me to get lost, why is she doing this to me??

I am going half crazy, after 2 teddy bears, 11 bunches of flowers and 7 emails, its time I faced facts, she just doesnt like me, not even enough to tell me get lost. If only I could just grow a pair and speak to her!!! I've got a constant dull ache in my chest that just won't go away and I can't get her out of my head for a second.

Sunny and Ruby had turfed me out of our room again, I went to the library where it was quiet to read. I heard quiet footsteps coming and quickly glanced up, the last person I expected it to be is Lilly. She stood there holding the purple teddy bear. Am I seeing things?! Too scared to look away in case she vanished, I could quite easily be imagining this, I put the book down on the seat and stood up. But it is real, she carried on walking towards me and stopped inches away from me.