Thursday, 30 May 2013

Chapter 35 ~ Gen 1 ~ Lilly

~ HOME ~


I became aware of being sat in a chair and there is somebody leaning over me.  "Come on Lilly open your mouth"  I watched as a spoon heaped with a pile of brown mush is coming towards me guided by an orange hand.  I can actually see it clearly only the edges of my vision now are blurred.  I felt the cold spoon touch my lips and I automatically opened my mouth.  "See I knew you could do it!!"  I looked in the direction of the voice and Mango is there holding the spoon staring at me with a huge smile on his face .  The stuff in my mouth tasted revolting, just having it in my mouth made me want to heave - I spat it out.

"Oh Lilly!!"  he said as he stood up looking disappointed. 

I suddenly heard a child laughing  "Mommy naughty"  I looked in the direction of the laughter, a little girl is sat on the carpet staring up at me laughing.  "Yes Coral,  Mommy is very naughty!!!"  Mango said to her and she giggled.  She started rocking backwards and forwards holding her feet while she is smiling up at me.  She is a familiar shade of purple, why it is familiar I'm not sure,  and she has Mango's orange hair and colourless eyes, I know instinctively that she is my child - I thought about that for a second, but how could I know that when I can't even remember them being babies, in fact I don't remember them at all, I don't remember be pregnant, I don't remember anything, not even what my own face looks like.

"We'll try again shall we"  I heard Mango say, he disturbed my train of thought and I looked in his direction just in time to see the spoon coming at me again heaped with another pile of brown mush, I shook my head because I didn't want it.  "You need to eat this Lilly"  He kept pushing the spoon at me.  "Come on please, just two or three mouthfuls."  he started pleading with me to eat.  Eventually I got sick of his nagging and I opened my mouth for him and in went the pile of mush and straight back out it came again - what is he feeding me baby food??  I heard him sigh as he put his head down and sat stationary for a while not saying or doing anything.

I can hear the little girl singing so I look down at her again.  She is singing away to her doll and she looks quite happy.  I wanted to pick her up and hold her but I knew I wouldn't be able to - I'm useless, I can't even feed myself, I hope this isn't how it is going to be forever.

Mango dropped the dish on the nearby table, the noise it made startled me, I thought he had given up on the idea of me eating until he held in front of me a different dish, this one containing green mush.  "Ok lets try this one, maybe you don't like the other one - this one is your favourite."  he said as the spoon started coming at me again. In went the green mush, I'd opened my mouth straight away to let it in thinking I suppose I should at least try it, curious to know what my favourite is.  Straight away I can taste it is apple, I know somehow this is how apple tastes.  I can eat this one, instinctively I try to chew it, but it doesn't need chewing, its a pile of mush, so I just swallow it.  Surprisingly it really hurt my throat, I can feel every bit of it sliding down like it is a mouthful of nails that I've just swallowed, not the soft sloppy mush that had been in my mouth.

Mango didn't say anything he just stood there smiling down at me.

He crouched down and sent another piled up spoon in my direction.  I clamped my mouth shut so that he couldn't get the spoon in.  "Come on Lilly  I need you to start eating then we can start removing all these tubes that you don't like."  I am sitting here being fed like a child and it makes me feel so useless and frustrated that I can't do it for myself, and I definitely didn't want anymore because of the pain now burning in my throat.  It is a struggle for me but I managed to control my arm and hand just enough to knocked the spoon flying out of his hand and away from my mouth.

He stood up looking wounded.

"Lilly PLEASE!!"  he's half shouting and half pleading  "I need you to come back - your babies need you and so do I!!"  I can tell by the tone of his voice that he is starting to get upset.  He stands there looking down at me and I can see his eyes are starting to fill with tears.  I can still hear Coral singing and I want to know where the boys are and why they are not here - I want to see them, but how do I tell him.

Suddenly he moved away and went over to the side and came back waving a clean spoon half a smile on his face.  "I was prepared for this, your son is very good at spoon throwing too!!!  We'll try again shall we."  I watched him load up the spoon and when it started coming my way I sat shaking my head.  "Lilly please you need to eat!!  Can't you at least try!!!"

I opened my mouth but not to let in the spoon that I can now see coming in my direction again and is getting closer and closer, he's miss read my actions, I am actually trying to speak.  I turned my head just in time to avoid it and the spoon hit my cheek while I'm struggling to speak,  I can see that Mango is getting annoyed with me now, as I sit here my mouth opening and closing while he is trying to clean the apple food off my face, but finally I managed to get the word out "Tap"  I said

"Tap? ......... what do you want to see Tapestry?"  he asked and I nodded  "If I get the boys for you will you eat just two more spoonfuls for me?"  I nodded again.  "Promise!"  I nodded and smiled.  I watched him smile back as he pulled out his phone his eyes not leaving me for a second.  "Mulberry can you bring the boys down here please, Lilly wants to see them."  He snapped off his phone and stuffed it back into his pocket, then tried to feed me another spoonful of the apple stuff, I kept my lips firmly shut while I looked up at him.  he looked at me and laughed "Ok, we'll wait, you can't blame me from trying!!."  Mango busied himself cleaning up the brown food that I'd spat everywhere earlier, again cleaning my face and clothes like I am a child while he is nattering away to me.  "You know your son is very cantankerous at meal times, now I know where he gets it from - you!!"  he said as he laughed   "Tapestry has turned avoiding food into an art form!!"

Finally the door opened and in walked Mulberry, he smiled at me while he held the door open.  "Mulberry!!"  I managed to say which made him laugh, then he just stood there grinning back at me.  He didn't look any different to how I saw him in my head, except for the beard he now has on his chin, I don't remember him having that before, even though I don't remember anything from before, I just don't see that beard on his face in my head.   Three toddlers came wandering into the room jabbering away to each other.  I got a little confused looking at the little girl who came in in front of the two boys.  She is that same shade of purple again with blue hair - who is she?  I watched as she sat on the carpet looking up at me like she has never seen me before.

Tapestry distracted my attention away from the little girl,  he ran straight up to me with a big grin on his face and said "Mommy wake up"  then he stopped dead for a moment like he is only just seeing that I am awake.  Mosaic has ran over to Coral who is still singing to her doll, unlike Tapestry neither of them really taking too much notice of me being here.  I sat watching them playing together for a few minutes, wandering why I couldn't remember them as babies.  How old are they anyway?  Tapestry is now sitting in front of me on the carpet just staring up at me, I suppose this would be the first time that he has seen me sat up, awake and aware, like this is the first time that I am seeing them properly.  "Mommy wake up, Daddy look." he said pointing at me with the cutest look on his face, his eyes wide open with surprise.

"Yes Tapestry, Mommy is awake, and now you can watch her eating her dinner."  I noticed he is speaking quite loudly to Tapestry again, I caught sight of the heaped up spoon coming in my direction again, Mango is really not going to let me get away without eating this stuff!!!  "Open up you promised and PLEASE Lilly, don't spit this out, Tapestry will probably copy you if he sees you doing it!!"  he said a lot quieter to me.  I looked up at him and he mouthed the word "Please" at me so I opened my mouth and let him shovel the food in. The second mouthful didn't hurt so much as it went down.

I saw a purple hand offer a bottle to Tapestry, who took it, he looked at the bottle then threw it away from him. I looked up at Mulberry, who is trying to retrieve the bottle and give it back to Tapestry.  "Come on Tap, you need to drink your milk!!"  After a little coaxing Tapestry took the bottle and instantly threw it away again, this time a little bit harder with a determined look on his face.  "Tapestry you are a naughty boy!!"  Mulberry said to him in a raised voice, the little boy just sat giggling at Mulberry who didn't look too happy!!

"Tap show Mommy how you drink your bottle like a big boy."  Mango said to him taking the bottle off Mulberry, who has retrieved it for a second time, and handed it to the little boy who is now sitting on the carpet with a pouty look on his face.  I am looking at him and he is just looking back at me with a right moody look on his face, his expression made me want to laugh.  "Come on Tapestry Mommy is waiting to see you drink your milk, so she can finish eating her dinner."  Tapestry looked at the bottle, shook it then looked up at me again quickly before he started shouting  "NO!!!  NOT COLD!!!"  angrily he launched the bottle across the room again.

"RIGHT THAT'S IT!!!"  Mango said loudly to him  "Mulberry can you take him to his room please while I finish feeding Lilly."  Straight away Tapestry started screaming, Mulberry picked him up, I watched as he held the now kicking and punching little boy at arms length at first waiting for him to calm down.  Mulberry called the little girl, Juniper, to go with him.  Is she Mulberry's child??  The little girl got up straight away and ran off out of the room smiling while Mulberry is struggling to hold open the door and keep a hold of Tapestry who is kicking and punching him while he is still screaming his head off.  Mulberry smiled at me again before he left the room, he didn't seem very bothered about the little boys antics, but I am.

"Naughty!!"  I said looking up at Mango

"Sorry Lilly I didn't want you to see that yet ....... yes he is very naughty ....... but he has a lot of problems, with his hearing and eye sight and he has a neurological disorder, he can't actually help his behaviour sometimes, it's his condition."  he is looking at me and rubbing his head with a worried look on his face, he's stressing, somehow I know he always does that when he's stressed.  "I'll explain it to you when you are well enough to take it all in, but it is nothing for you to worry about, he is a healthy little boy otherwise."

I found myself swallowing a mouthful of food that I didn't realize I had in my mouth.  He showed me the empty dish.  "Aren't you clever - you ate it all!!"  he said and started to laugh  "I'll have to employ Tapestry to distract you at every meal time I think!!  It is a lot easier to feed you when you don't protest"  It hadn't even registered that all the time I'd been watching Tapestry perform Mango had carried on feeding me and I'd been eating the apple stuff without even realizing it...

The door opened again  "Mango is it okay if me and Cherry take Coral to the park with Honey??"  I heard a strange voice  "I'm sorry I didn't realize ....... Lilly is still awake!!"   I looked at the person stood by the door and was stunned for a minute - Affair? - is it?  He's too old to be Affair, it can't be Affair, he is still a child in my head.  Cherry?  Honey? now who are they??

"Yes fine, just don't bring her back too late Affair, she needs bath and bed by six remember."  Mango said.  I watched as 'Affair' came across the room to pick up Coral.  He stood smiling at me, but my brain couldn't take it in.

"Not Affair!!!"  I said,  Mango and Affair both gave me a strange look.

"Yes that's Affair Lilly, he has grown up a lot while you have been away!!"  Mango started laughing  "He's going to be graduating soon and he's even got himself a steady girlfriend, remember Cherry, you have a lot of catching up to do which we can do when you are feeling better."

"Cherry??  Honey??"  I asked, I hate all these names that I don't know.

"Cherry and Honey are both Sunny and Ruby's kids, Cherry you know, Honey is the same age as the triplets so you haven't seen her yet - eight kids they have now you know, you was right about those two!!"  Mango said to me  "Eight kids!!"  he started laughing, obviously that was supposed to mean something to me but what I don't know.  I'm confused, I'm still none the wiser,  Sunny I think I can see in my head, but Ruby - another name I don't know.  I didn't have the strength to question Mango anymore.

Affair smiled at me again before he told Mango he'd have Coral back by six and he left the room.

Mango moved my chair over towards where Mosaic is now playing happily alone at the brick table in the corner of the room.  He picked me up out of the wheelchair and sat me on the sofa and he sat down next to me.  He put his arm around me and took my hand with his other and started to play with my fingers.  "We need to let that food go down a little before I put you back to bed, hopefully you will start feeling normal soon!!"  he went quiet as we just sat there for a while  "You are not tired are you?"  he asked and I shook my head in response, even though I am feeling tired I want to carry on sitting here with him, I didn't want to go back to that bed where I would be alone.

The door knocked then opened and Mulberry is stood in the doorway again, "Your Dad has got him to drink his milk."  he said to Mango then he turned to speak to the little boy  "Mosaic come on Nanny is waiting to put you in the bath."  Mosaic immediately stopped what he was doing and ran out of the room Mulberry holding the door open for him.  "Thanks Mulberry, I'll be up to put them to bed in a bit."  Mango said to him just before he smiled and went out closing the door behind him.  "I really don't know what I would  have done without Mulberry's help over these past three years."

"Lilly where have you been for the past four years?"  he suddenly asked me.  All I can do is shrug my shoulders at him, because I really don't have a clue.   I am hoping that he will tell me where I have been and why I feel like this ........ totally useless, hardly able to move my arms and legs, hardly able to talk, so weak he has to feed me, carry me around and do everything for me like I am a young child, and my head, it feels so heavy, I can't remember a thing about my past and keeps switching off so that I'm oblivious to what is going on around me for long periods of time, and I just feel so tired all the time.

Mango is sat just watching my face "Lilly do you know what has happened to you?"  he asked me I shook my head to tell him that I didn't know.

"You have been in a coma for the past four years and you started to wake up nearly two months ago, you fell down the stairs, do you remember?"  I shook my head as I am watching him playing with my fingers, he is spinning the ring that I have on my left hand, a ring I didn't even realize was there till just now.  A wedding ring .......... are we married?

Suddenly he started talking again  "I would love to know what kept you in that coma for so long, four years is a very long time, you know I had lost all hope of you ever waking up."  he looked up at me for a second but he still carried on spinning the ring, then he looked away again as he carried on talking, mumbling more like he is talking out loud or to himself rather than to me.  "I started to think all sorts, I even started to doubt that maybe you didn't love me after all, that you didn't wanted to come back to me, I kept thinking maybe you couldn't face living without Cosmic and that's why you were staying in there ..........."   he looked up at me suddenly   "I'm sorry ........."  he stood up abruptly like he had said something that he shouldn't or wished he hadn't said.  "I need to get you back to bed you must be tired, but first I need to change you, look at you, you've made more mess than the kids!!"  he started laughing as he brushed his hand over some of the mess on my clothes, that is now dried in.

"Who ..... is ...... Cosmic?"  I asked him slowly.  He froze and is staring back at me with a totally shocked expression written all over his face.

"Who is Cosmic??  Oh Berry!!  Lilly you know who Cosmic is!!"  I shrugged my shoulders then shook my head, I don't have a clue who Cosmic is!!!  

"Lilly .............. you don't remember Cosmic??"  I shook my head again  "Berry!!!" he said as he started to rub his head, that worried look came over his face again.  "Fudge!! ..... Lilly ..... you do know who I am ....... don't you???!!!"  Of course I do - well sort of - I nodded my head and smiled at him as I watched a look of relief wash over his face.

"Who ....... is ....... Cosmic?"  I asked him again, but he didn't answer me, he's just looking at me now scratching his head.

Suddenly he turned away from me, I get the feeling I am still not going to get an answer to my question.  "Okay, you are probably too tired right now, you have been with us for most of today, we don't want to over do it,  lets put you to bed and we'll talk about it tomorrow."   he started busying himself again moving things around.  He is right, I am tired, I'm now struggling to keep my eyes open.  He changed the gown I'm wearing for a clean one, he pushed the chair up to the bed then picked me up and carried me to the bed and lay me down carefully, not saying another word to me but he has a very troubled look on his face, I would love to know what he's thinking.

He stood just looking down at me for a few minutes "Sleep, you've done a lot today."  he kissed my head then went to move away and I didn't want him to go.

"Stay."  I said hoping it is loud enough for him to hear.  He turned and looked at me then he smiled, he seemed to hesitate for a moment then he kicked off his shoes and lay down on the small bed next to me, like he knew what I wanted him to do.

"I'll stay for a while then I have to go and see to the kids, the nurse will be here soon to sit with you through the night."  he wrapped his arm around me moving me closer to him  "But I'll be back later, I've spend the last three years sleeping on that couch over there."  I heard him say as I felt myself drifting off to sleep.


Its a different day, I'm not sure what day or even how long it has been since the last time that I  was "with it".  The first thing I know, I'm sat in the chair and Mango is talking to me while he is brushing and plaiting my hair, he is telling me about something that happened at work earlier, this confused me, he works?  Where?  I should know this but I don't. he is talking to me about someone call Forrest another name I can not put a face to.

Mango had just finished plaiting my hair when the door opened, I can hear a screaming child coming - I already know who it is going to be - Tapestry - he came into the room in the arms of a blue woman.  "Sorry he was in a good mood, but he has drawn a picture for Lilly and wanted to bring it down straight away, I said later and that set him off."  Tapestry now has stopped screaming and has a big grin on his face, he is clutching a piece of paper in his hand, which the blue woman took from him carefully and handed it to me, then she just stood there smiling down at me still holding Tapestry in her arms.  "It's nice to see you awake finally."  she said to me - who is she?  Does she know me?

"Mommy wake up look!!"  he said and started pointing at the picture he has drawn for me.  "Picture look."  he said reminding that I'm holding the piece of paper in my hand.  I looked down at the paper and it is just a load of coloured scribble which made me smile.

"Very Nice!!"  I said as I handed it to Mango. He told Tapestry he is a clever boy and said he would put it on the wall for me later when he can find some drawing pins and went over to place it on the table by my bed.  I am looking at the blue woman again who has lots of horrible scars on her face, I don't recognize her and what is wrong with her face??   

"Who's she?"  I said pointing at her.  Mango exchanged looks with her, then they both look at me with puzzled expressions on their faces.

"You know who Ice is!!"  Mango said to me  "You remember Ice don't you Lilly?!"  I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head, I'd never seen her before so why should I remember her!!!!

"Who is she?"  I said as they both just stood there looking at me, Mango is rubbing his head again with that worried look on his face, should I know her?  I'm sure if I'd seen her before I would remember, especially with her face the way it is.

"We went to school with Ice, remember, she lives here with us, in fact it was you who asked her and Mulberry to live here."  He stood looking at me for a second like he is waiting for me to remember "and she is your Sister-In-Law now, she's married to Mulberry and they have a little girl, Juniper, you saw her earlier."  All the time he is talking to me I'm shaking my head at him, I really have never seen this woman before - what he is saying doesn't mean a thing or make any sense to me, I am still sat staring at her because I really don't remember her.  Mango is standing there now with his eyes closed muttering to himself  "Berry!! ...........Fudge!! ........... this is what I was scared off!!"

"Mango??!  What's wrong?  How can she not remember me?"  Ice asked him

He turned to her and started to talk to her quietly but they were too close to me the only way I wouldn't have heard what he is saying to her is if he had whispered it into her ear, but he didn't  "Memory loss, could even be brain damage, when she recognized me, Mulberry and Affair I thought she was going to be fine, but yesterday I mentioned Cosmic and she acted like she didn't know who he was, I was shocked at the time, but since I've thought maybe she needs to see a picture of him to remind her!!!"  I watched as Ice's mouth dropped open, a shocked look on her face, she quickly looked in my direction then back to Mango  "She's got some tests coming up at the hospital next week, oh Berry I hope this isn't brain damage!!  I knew this was all too good to be true and going far too well!!!"

"Don't worry, I'm sure she'll be fine!!  Cosmic will come back to her, didn't you say yourself it's early days yet!!"  Ice said to Mango, do they not realize I am sat right here listening to them talking about me - I wish someone would tell me what is going on here!!!

"I should go back upstairs, I've left Mulberry alone feeding the others he'll be pulling his hair out by now, can I leave Tap down here, he has eaten?"  she said looking at Mango, he told her to leave Tapestry, she placed him on the floor and he ran over and sat down and started playing the xylophone.  The sound of it seemed very familiar - I knew I could hear a xylophone while I was drifting in and out of the darkness, I hadn't been mad after all like I'd thought I was, and all this time I've been lying in that bed oblivious and my children have been playing around me all along.

After Ice left he moved my chair and he sat me down on the sofa like yesterday and  sat down beside me, but today he didn't put his arm around me.  "Lilly, I need to ask you some questions, but tell me when you are getting tired, I don't want you to over do it."  I smiled at him.  "What is my name?"  he said which I thought was a pretty stupid thing for him to ask me.  I told him "Mango"  he smiled then he asked me "Who am I?"  I laughed and thought about the ring on my finger which I pointed to and he smiled again but I thought I saw a look of relief mixed up with the smile.

"Do you remember falling down the stairs?"  I shook my head, didn't he mention that to me yesterday?!  I think that's how I ended up in the coma.   He hasn't actually told me how I fell down the stairs and I have been wandering why, I've tried to think and I can't remember anything about my life before I started to wake up, I just seemed to know certain things but I don't exactly know why I know them.

"Do you know who Mulberry is?"  I told him 'my brother'  "Prelude?"  I said 'my brother' again.  "Good, what about Caramel?"  Caramel - I recognized the name but had to think, then it came to me, suddenly I can see her in my mind and I said 'my friend', he then asked me if I could remember what colour Caramel is and I told him brown.  He smiled at me, he looked happy, but that look soon vanished after he asked me  "What about Ruby?"  Now I'm stuck, I sat thinking but nothing is coming to me, I shrugged my shoulders  "You don't remember Ruby?"  he asked and I shook my head.  He looked really disappointed.

Then he slowly started to real off a list of names to which my answer for all of them is a shrug of my shoulders and a shake of the head.  I didn't know any of the names that he threw at me, they meant nothing to me and there isn't a face in my head for them.  The longer the list got the more depressed he started to look.  "Alpine, Cosmic, Twilight, Wisteria, Jazz, Lime, Violet, Bayleaf, Lime. Cherry, Crimson"  He is looking really worried now, then he said Sunny and I said "dancing", I remember Sunny, I can see his yellow face in my head and just know we did a lot of dancing together, this made Mango laugh for a few minutes  "Who could forget Sunny!!"  he said.  Then the expression on his face got serious again  "Lilly is there anyone or anything you can remember?"  he asked and I had to think, my head is blank for a minute then a few faces flashed into my head.

"Mom ........ Dad"  he smiled at me again and asked if I meant my Mom and Dad or his Mom and Dad, I shrugged my shoulders at him, I'm confused, I don't know who's Parents they are, I just know they are Mom and Dad.

"Can you remember Dad's name?"  I told him 'Spicey'  "Spicey is my Dads name, Lilly can you remember your Dad's name?"  I couldn't, I couldn't see anyone else in my head  so I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head  "What colour is Mom?"  he asked and I told him purple and yellow, he told me that is his Mom again now my own, my own I don't remember at all.  "A few more questions then you need a rest."  he said as he took my hand  "Do you remember where or how we met Lilly?"  I thought about it for a minute and my mind is just blank, my head is starting to hurt I shook my head.  "What about school, do you remember anything about the school we went to?"  again I shook my head.  Then he said  "Cosmic, are you sure you still don't remember Cosmic?" 

"No!!!  who is Cosmic?"  I'm starting to get a little irritated keep hearing that name, I wander why yesterday and today he should keep mentioning Cosmic, who is he??  and why won't he tell me who he is??

"Lilly THINK you have to remember Cosmic!!"

"NO!!!  Who ...... is ...... he?"

Again he didn't answer my question because the door opened and Prelude walked in, I recognize him instantly.   I said "Prelude" and he smiled at me.

"Sleeping beauty is finally awake!!"  he said

"Stormie come?!"  Tapestry suddenly stopped playing the xylophone and started to get excited when he saw Prelude.  I noticed Mango and Prelude exchange a strange look as Mango quickly picked me up off the sofa and walked across the room to put me back in my chair, I wasn't sure why.

"Storm me play with Storm!!!"  Tapestry ran up to Prelude who picked him up.  Storm, I've heard that name before - who is Storm?  Then Tapestry started screaming  "Storm now!!"   Prelude tried to quieten Tapestry down by tickling him and tell him he'd take him to see Storm later.

"Who is Storm?"  I asked and Mango and Prelude just stood there looking at each other and then they turn to staring at me.  Prelude looks uncomfortable.

"Damn it Prelude, I knew this would happen!!"  Mango snapped at Prelude who gave him a strange look.  "You know I didn't want her finding out about this till she's able to deal with it!!"  They started bickering like they had forgotten I am here listening to them.

"I'm sorry!!  What for Berry's sake do you want the three of us to do - vanish!!  One of the kids was bound to mention them sooner or later, you just need to tell her the truth, if she hates me for it - she hates me - what can I do, they are my kids for Berrys sake!!"

Then Mango turned to me, he looked far from happy  "Storm is your nephew, Prelude and Manderine have two boys Storm and Parsley, they are a little younger than our three."  They both stood looking at me like they are waiting for some kind of reaction but I just smiled at them, what is their problem?!  What was that argument about, who is Manderine?  I'm getting very confused - is this something else I'm supposed to know about but can't remember?!  I wanted to see them.

"See them."  I said, Mango and Prelude exchanged a strange look again then Prelude told me they weren't here, he'd left them at home with a baby sitter.  Somehow, I don't know how, I just know he is lying to me!!!  My head is hurting I'm not sure I can take anything else in.

"I'm tired"  I told Mango, I'm starting to struggle to keep my eyes open again.  He quickly picked me up off the sofa and carried me across the room to lie me on the bed.

"I'm sorry, I overdid it with the questions."  he said as he kissed my face.  I closed my eyes as soon as he lay me on the bed but I didn't fall straight to sleep.  I heard him move away

"If she gets upset by this Prelude I'm never going to forgive you!!!"   I heard Mango snap

"How is she?"  Prelude asked him

"She okay, but, her memory, she can hardly remember anything, thankfully for your sake!!."  There is a slight pause then I noticed Mango is talking a little quieter than before "She seriously didn't recognize Ice when she came in earlier and she only seems to remember me, you, Mulberry, Caramel, Sunny, my parents and Affair she doesn't remember anybody else not even Cosmic."  There is that name again.

"Cosmic, really, you're kidding?!"  Prelude said

"No, she doesn't remember Cosmic or Twilight, she never even flinched when I mentioned their names, she just had this blank look on her face like she did for everyone else I asked her about - your parents, Lime, school, things that should have provoked a reaction from her didn't,  its like she's wiped all the bad things out of her mind."

"Is this memory loss going to be permanent?  Is she going to make a full recovery?"  Prelude asked

"I don't know, she's going to have to spend a few weeks in hospital soon I've booked her in for a load of tests, and she needs some speech therapy and extensive physio to get her moving and mobile again .... as for her memory I guess we will just have to wait and see - I did warn you not all of her might come back and so far its actually looking pretty good compared to what we could have had to contend with, there is no paralysis, her speech is normal and she seems to be functioning okay.   The only thing worrying me is she does still keep switching on and off for long periods, she should be fully awake by now - that with the memory loss is very worrying."

They went quiet and I couldn't fight off the darkness any longer and I drifted off to sleep.

"I can't help thinking, Lilly not remembering her past might be a blessing for her in some cases, at least she won't have to remember all the really bad stuff that really upset her."  Mango said  "You can smile Prelude, Lilly not remembering doesn't mean you and Lime will get away with this scott free - I will always remember and so will everyone else!!  And I hope your conscience never stops killing you!!!"


Song ~ Home ~ Daughtry



  1. that last part... auch... but Mango is right... though had Prelue (sorry spelling) known how Lime looked he would (maybe) have been even more carefull... she could still have tricked him.

    nice chapther happy she is getting more awake... hope she remember soon... hope they keep talking to her re introducing her to people and thing.

    1. Prelude blames himself because he thinks if he had not spent all that time trying to avoid what he knew was coming (that he would fall in love with her) If he hadn't avoided her then he thinks he could have stopped Limes rampage - but if he had I would have had to tell a different story - lol - and you're right she could have tricked him from the start.

      mmm - does she remember - we will have to wait and see :)

  2. That was a really good chapter! I kinda hope she doesn't remember and can just move on and live a happy life.

    1. Thanks :) That would be the best for her wouldn't it - never remembering!!
      But just imagine all the complications that could cause in the future - lol - you know I could write another 10 chapters for this generation - but Ive got to stop!! Tapestry is getting very impatient :)

    2. Yeah I could see her story going on and on. Bet you never guessed that generation 1 would last so It's been really good though.

    3. No I never thought I'd get 36 chapters out of her!! And really I could go on - lol - you know what im like for getting sidetracked lol - I will be sad to leave Lilly but moreso for Mango who I have got very attached to.

  3. I appreciate the long recovery, step by step.

  4. I love how you're taking each step back for her recovery and it might be best if she never remembers and can just make new memories with her kids and nephews.

    1. Thanks :) It would be nice for her never to remember :)

  5. Aww Mango. I get that he's mad at Prelude because Lime was the reason he's had to have this crazy life for so long, but he should know Prelude is always struggling every day with his conscience. No need to rub it into Prelude's face, he already feels bad. As for Lilly I hope she can get into physical therapy soon so she can feed herself again, I can't imagine being an adult and being that dependent on someone. I'm glad she is recovering, maybe her memory loss is just part of her mind shielding her from all the people who were mean to her back then.